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George McCoy. Yes, I'll say it again for those who think they may have misread what I have written: "GEORGE McCOY!!!"

 

 

For those who have been around for years, no name is as likely to incite annoyance, anger and loathing than that of George McCoy (unless you're Galahad, ex-owner of PunterNet, in which case, Harriet Harman probably has the same effect). If you have never heard of him, George is a veritable legend of the punting world - not because of whom he shagged, but because of what he has written. In brief, he was the creator, and initial author, of McCoy's Guide to Adult Services, a series of guidebooks providing details of escorts and massage parlours across the country.

 

 

When they first appeared, these books were revolutionary, rather like the Michelin Guide was for restaurants or CAMRA's Good Beer Guide was to pubs. Although the idea of cataloguing escort reviews wasn't new, being centuries old, what made his concept different was that the guides were frequently updated, and not only had brief basic information and photos, but also went further by highlighting which ladies and parlours were worth visiting. As seen in the screenshots below, the information was concise but useful, whether it be for the general city guides or the more specific sections dealing with each parlour (although the use of masquerade masks to protect the privacy of the ladies dates them considerably).

 

 

Interestingly, the cover price for this particular issue was £10 in 2002, so once we account for inflation, the current price would be £18. Putting that into context, it is cheaper than the £25 you have to pay (in Bitcoin) to access similar info from a popular UK Punting review site. Given said forum members always whinge about escort rates, I do have to wonder if they have cottoned on that they are being taken for a mug in paying more than punters of old would pay for similar information?

 

The reason I say George McCoy arouses such visceral emotions is largely down to the manner in which he created and ran his guidebooks. Whether you were a client, escort or business owner, old flatcap was like Marmite, as each individual either liked him or hated him. In brief:

  • To clients, it depended on whether or not they were already members of the nascent punting boards in the early noughties, like PNet, Preston Punters or C69. If not, his guides were a godsend, giving them all the information they needed in one place. However, to active reviewers, he was a leach, taking the info left in their reviews, and passing it off as his own research for a profit;

 

  • To ladies, he was a source of publicity, although not all of them were keen on appearing in his guide. In the pre-AdultWork world, few escorts had an online presence, except for some with websites of their own or profiles on directories prevailing at the time. With his guide, it was possible for them to reach a wider audience of potential clients across the land, especially if they were ones which had a high rating. The disadvantage of this was that such a rating depended solely on his whims, hence allegations that he would try in a less than subtle way to get his leg over with them in return for an improved rating (although he always inferred that he never penalised those who rejected his "offers");

 

  • Finally, to some parlour owners, he was a git, especially if their places had low ratings, in which case they were never around when he came calling to flog ad space in his books. Conversely, his guide was fantastic to others, particularly if their parlours had 5 stars while their competitors didn't, in which case he'd often be invited by the boss to enjoy meeting one of the staff and experiencing their skills "on the house", which was the sort of hospitality nobody else had. Finally, there were those who never could quite tell whether they liked him or not, such as a well-known Manchester massage parlour of the past. Despite their famous song-and-dance routine about being a George McCoy Free Zone, not only were Sandys happy to be in his guide, but mervert even mentioned it in a prominent space on top of the website. Rather like a marriage of convenience, they then kissed and made up, such that it was clear that they were more than happy to put up with the old fart in return for the publicity, with their banning being worth little more than hot air.

 

When you are a fan of George McCoy ...
When you can't make up your mind about whether you are a fan of George McCoy (above) or whether you are not a fan of George McCoy (below).

 

Now, you are probably wondering why I am mentioning all of this. Well, in recent years, I had assumed McCoy's Guides had gone the same way as The Yellow Pages, being replaced by new media channels which had rendered it obsolescent. After all, for ladies, advertising is easy as pie, with social media and sites like AW being cheap and manageable, without the inconvenience of paperbooks. Likewise, for clients, there are loads of ways to report on a date, be it on established boards like UKP and PN, or via the feedback mechanism on AdultWork.

 

Therefore, I was very surprised recently when I saw several posts from the McCoys account appear on my Twitter timeline with content written in his unique style. With further examination, not only does it seem that the McCoys website is still around, but it appears to be flourishing. While I'm unsure if it is McCoy himself doing the editing or research, given he is old as hell, it appears the guides are not only being updated for the UK, but they are expanding in scope too. If you take a look at his recent tweets, not only does he continue to provide snippets about UK escorts, it looks like he has branched out to do reviews on American escorts too. I know the Yanks have inflicted Donald Trump and Mickey Mouse on the UK, but all I can ask is this - have they really done enough to deserve to have such pain inflicted on them in return?

screenshots of mccoys guide twitter

 

Anyway, if you've managed to read this far, then well done. If you've ever dealt with old flatcap, let us know on Twitter, as it seems that everyone has a different tale to recount of meeting him, either in a professional or a punting capacity. In other news, we're happy to say that we now have a collection of new photos up on Nadia's profile, which we hope you enjoy.

Please forgive the lack of updates, but when the world has been going to hell in a handbasket, then the incentive which exists to write anything tends to go down the shitter (much like the valuation of Elon Musk's recently acquired Twitter). That doesn't mean to say that we have not been doing anything at Club Indigo, as in between having some ladies come and go on a trial basis, we have also been keeping up to date with some refurbishments at the place.

 

Of course, what really matters is profile updates, so we're sure that you'll be happy to know that Mia has new photos on her profile (along with a number of photos and videos in her Adultwork profile). She does seem to be settling in quite well and is proving to be quite popular, so much so that she has an incedible knack of having gentlement who visit extending their appointments within minutes of meeting, so taken are they by her and her feminine charms. In a way, it is natural, because in a world of hate, war, fear and geopolitical tension, we all need someone to bring us love and happiness while easing our very own physical tension.

 

What a weird week it has been. Like many, my attention has focused on the story posted by a national newspaper over what someone at the BBC was alleged to be up to. Initially, it seems like another rerun of the Jimmy Saville scandal, with the BBC trying to cover the identity of the person up, leading to lots of potentially libelous statements over who it could be. Now though, it looks like it was simply a case of the presenter Huw Edwards paying to see some naked pics of a dude on OnlyFans (although paying £35K does sound like a lot for private gallery pics). This is a story which is going to run for a long time though, and I hope that the people who OK'd a sensationalist story with minimal facts get severely punished for it. However, I'm probably pissing in the wind with this hope, as the offending paper is the nation's favourite source of shit news, The Sun, who could probably outdo Joseph Goebbels in dragging the truth through a gutter.

 

There is not much of an update for Indigo this week, other than to say that Paula has new photos on her profile. We hope you enjoy them - all I can say is that she would definitely look better naked than Huw Edwards, according to some pic said to be on the net.

 

According to the BBC, the world is enduring the hottest average temperature ever. Scenes of raging wildfires, parched rivers and apocalyptic heat appear to be on TV all the time to confirm this. It is hell out there, and if things get any worse than they are, I'm going to do the only sensible thing any person can do, which is to bash my TV to smithereens.

 

Needless to say, if you live in the Greater Manchester area, you'll probably have experienced this nightmare summer scenario too. Rather than raining every single day of the week, we now seem to be enduring just 6 rainy days on a regular basis Clearly, the clouds seem to be taking unkindly to the El Nino weather phenomenon, and are now behaving like train drivers with their regular days off every week. If things continue at this rate, we may end up for enough days to play a full cricket test match without any rain interupting play. Whether that is a good thing though depends on your feelings about whether there is still a sense of fairplay in cricket with players behaving according to "the spirit of the game". While I feel it was wrong for Johnny Bairstow to have been run out in the way he had, if the shoe had been on the other foot and it had been an Australian player to be stumped in a similar fashion, I'd be all for it, since nobody whinges quite like they do.

 

Anyway, less about the robbin' gits behind the crease, and on to the lovely Robin. If you've come in through our index page, you'll note that we have a new lady with us. She's a gorgeous new babe called Robin - she's pretty, she's English, she is very funny, and she is in on Monday. We are sure she will be a great addition to the team, and hope you give her a warm welcome.

It was with some interest yesterday that I heard Nigel Farage announce on Twitter that his UK bank accounts had been closed. In case you've awoken from a 100 year slumber and don't know who he is, he was a key Brexit advocate and former leader of UKIP (no, not UKP, which is UK Punting, but UKIP, the UK Independence Party). According to our Nigel, the reason for this closure is because of "serious political persecution at the very highest level of our system", which I guess means that he thinks someone doesn't like him. I have no idea why he has that idea, as at least 51.9% of the population would probably have shared a pint with him a few years ago (if not share a seat on an airplane with him, according to this foxy OnlyFans model).

 

 

In addition, he complained that he was given "no explanation or recourse" as to why this had happened, leaving him in a state of limbo. Now, if you believe in deep state conspiracies, then you may be inclined to think that Nigel Farage is yet again a victim of the establishment. As such, "they" are out to get him for being the Messiah the naughty boy of British politics, who has done no wrong in standing up for our rights. Since "they" have no way of kicking a man of the people out of the country, they're doing the next best thing by inconveniencing his life and stopping him from paying for his online shopping or getting his pension from the EU. Alternatively, if you are protected by Parliamentary privilege like Chris Bryant MP, then you may think the bank closure is justified if linked in some way to receiving half a million quid from the malodorous Russia Today TV station. Should such an allegation be true, then it is perhaps not surprising that UK banks would be queasy about dealing with an individual who is happy to shill for the propaganda arm of a fascist foreign government, especially one whose activities would make their KYC alarmbells tingle.

 

Now, while I have no wish to bring politicial stuff to this site, I did find it bizarre that this bank closure happened just weeks after posting a piece on how sex workers are coping with the closure of their bank accounts. It just goes to show that such restrictions don't apply just to "the little people", but can also be used to go after well-known individuals with power or influence. That said, I was amazed at how some media individuals rushed to Nigel Farage's defence over what happened - their hypocrisy stinks, as they kept silent when it happened to people whose interests they didn't like, be it escorts or OnlyFans models, but now that one of their own is affected, they realise that they could be next, so now they are raising public awareness of this issue.

 

Still, I guess every cloud has a silver lining. For years, Nigel Farage has been a major fan of cryptocurrency, appearing in loads of clips advocating the merits of Bitcoin, such as this one, this one, this one, or even this one. Should it be impossible for him to get a UK bank account, then maybe now would be a great opportunity for Farage to demonstrate to everyone just how fantastic crypto is as an alternative to traditional banking products. Hell, even though he doesn't have an OnlyFans account (yet!), maybe he'll use bitcoin to take payment when appearing with his fellow content creators on Cameo.

 

Anyway, may yours be a good weekend blessed with schadenfreude.

This is just a short update to say that we have now placed a new series of photos on the profile page for Mia, which we think you will seriously enjoy. Not only have we had more time to take them, but we also think that she is getting more comfortable having them done too, which means they are getting a bit more spicy.

 

There is also a link to her Twitter account there, which will hopefully put paid to the one question she keeps getting asked - does she really speak Arabic, or is she blagging it? It sounds Greek to me, but then so did Patrice when chatting on the phone to some of her friends. Anyway, take a look at her pinned tweet, then decide for yourself, while enjoying her spicy ass pics!

 

No other news worth mentioning this week, except to say that we hope to have a new lady called Amber in on Monday (fingers crossed).

 

In the past week, I came across a piece of news in the financial press which led me to think about how changes in the escort industry often reflect changes in the wider world. In brief, what happened is that a firm known as Diebold Nixdorf declared bankruptcy, stating that it was about $2 billion in debt. Now, in case the name is not familiar, what they make definitely will be: they are the largest manufacturer in the world of automatic teller machines, holding 32% of the global market share in this line of business. That sounds impressive, but iecently, their business model has plummeted, as they have sold significantly fewer cash dispensers, given that people have moved to alternative payment methods which rely less on the need for physical cash notes.

 

I found this interesting, as one of the things I've noticed has been the way escort bookings have been paid for has changed significantly over time. Traditionally, escorting has been a strictly cash business, where you pay your money, and in return, a lady lets you have her honey. Sure, there have been times where bartering of services would take place, or where payment in goods would occur (as happened with the reallife Texas Chicken Ranch, satirised by ZZ Top and Dolly Parton, with clients could bring in birds of one kind in return for naughty favours from birds of another kind). However, as a general rule, cash has been king for a long time; almost as long as prostitution itself has been known as the oldest profession.

 

In the past two decades though, there have been a number of gradual shifts in payment methods, leading to changes in behaviour and opportunities for all parties involved. First, some massage parlours started taking card payments, with even extinct venues like Sandys Superstars and World Famous Babes accepting credit and debit cards about 20 years ago. From a client point of view, this made them great places to visit, as now they had somewhere to collect frequent flyer miles and put their meets down as a business expense.

 

However, from a business point of view, they were even more attractive, due to a reason that is never mentioned. This was because now, with cards, clients had a quick and easy way to extend their bookings without having to nip out for money once their cash had run out. The net effect was that what was originally a 30 minute meet with Miss Whiplash could now be turned into a multiple hour appointment with Miss Whiplash and her pals in the VIP room for as long as the card funds allowed (or until the credit limit was maxed). While it doesn't take the brains of a giraffe, or man, to figure out that this was problematic when it came to money management, there was nothing to stop some individuals from getting hooked on hookers, which is what definitely happened.

 

That said, few establishments or individuals accepted cards due to the risks involved, with the biggest exception being findom ladies, who have rather efficiently suckered men into being cashpigs via ATM "cashmeets". Instead, what we have seen is a greater acceptance of alternate non-cash payments, hastened by the greater need for contactless payments during the Covid epidemic; increased acceptance of mobile phone apps, and the coming of many new fintech firms operating as online processors and virtual banks.

 

Because of this, new ways of engaging in sexwork have developed, some of which are improvements on old methods, while others are totally new. For example, previously, payments occured on the day of the meet, as that was when the client would meet a lady and give her a pretty envelope with dough. Now though, it is possible to pay deposits prior to an appointment, which has made it increasingly possible to meet a whole new selection of ladies, either locally or through the tours and FMTYs which are becoming commonplace. This is largely since ladies now have a greater degree of confidence that a client is genuine when he covers at least some of their fee in advance than would have happened in the past. Similarly, we are now witnessing the development of a whole new online genre of sexworker, in the guise of the online findom brats, who generally collect tributes without ever meeting their "clients", or simps, in person.[Y}

 

Regardless of how you look at it, the overall effect has been a gradual decline in the flow of physical cash in the adult industry, just like see occuring in the wider world. The effect of this change has been widespread, ranging from the mundane, such as handbags and wallets shrinking in size, right through to the significant, such as entire towns losing all of their bank branches, adversely impacting community life.

 

Now, it appears that we are reaching yet another inflection point when it comes to cashless payments for adult services, with the arrival of a new kid on the block in the guise of cryptocurrency. In case you have heard of cryptocurrencies but don't know what they are, they are effectively digital currencies where all transactions are recorded on an online register in a realtime basis by a digital database using cryptography. It sounds fancy, but means there are millions of computers globally, burning electricity on a massive scale, to run this system, doing calculations nonstop to keep these registers of transactions up to date.

 

Along with its speed, transparency and relatively lower transaction costs, advocates claim that such a system is fantastic, as it means crypto operates outside of the authority of the government and central banks. In doing so, this reflects the "true" value of money without state manipulation, via measurres such as interest rates and quantitative easing. There are loads of different cryptocurrencies on the market, each with different values, of which the best known is Bitcoin, so to make things easier, we'll refer to all crypto-dough as being bitcoin.

 

Crypto has been around for a decade now, and has been a bit of a rollercoaster in terms of valuations, but what is clear is that ever more providers of adult services and goods are now happy to accept crypto. From escorting and femdom, through to advertising and toy sales, sellers are clearly stating that they are happy to deal in crypto. In part, this is just standard business practice, going with the flow of what competing retailers do in the wider world of commerce. However, in other aspects, it is more profound than the earlier step of going cashless, by avoiding the concept of cash entirely. This is since crypto now offers a way for marginalised sellers in the adult industry to circumvent the stranglehold that the banking sector has been increasingly applying to it in recent years.

 

In brief, high street banks have increasingly questioned the manner in which providers of adult services earn their funds, for reasons which are good and bad. From a legal point of view, this is problematic in a country like England, where the legal position is there is nothing written down to prevent a woman from working as a prostitute (or in the wider field of adult entertainment, from being a stripper to an OnlyFans model). Thus, if the job is not illegal, you would expect a woman could go about her job, earn money, and then rightfully deposit it at her local bank, safe in the knowledge that it is an acceptable economic activity which does not need to be questioned.

 

However, this is not quite the case, as financial institutions can, and will, be queasy when it comes to how these funds are obtained. In part, this is within their remit to ask questions of interest, as they have a legal obligation imposed on them under their banking licenses to engage in what is referred to as "know your client" dilligence. Thus, when working girls go onto sites to complain about a bank teller asking where their cash came from, all the bank is doing is covering its ass like it it entitled to do (although they often turn a hypocritical blind eye when significantly larger funds are deposited into offshore accounts from dodgy oligarchs, sanctioned governments and fake companies which are clearly up to no good).

 

However, in the past couple of years, financial institutions have also acted against sexworker due to moralistic reasons. While this has been most prevalent in the USA, it has occured in the UK too, with sexworkers not only losing access to banking facilitites, but also having their funds frozen for substantial periods of time. The most egregious example of this though is from Mastercard, one of the two big credit card processors in the world. Soom after the Republican government in the USA passed FOSTA-SESTA, ostensibly to curb exploitation online, Mastercard went one step by introducing a new policy which effectively barred a wide range of adult transactions from being undertaken unless subject to types of review which could be both time-consuming and costly. In the UK, the most noticeable impact has been on AdultWork, where ladies now have to jump through more hurdles than they did before to something even as basic as posting a new photo on that platform (although other advertising sites, such as Vivastreet, just don't give a shit and carry on with business as usual). Despite being derided as being unconstitutional in the USA, the Mastercard restrictions are likely to remain in force here unless the UK government does something about it, which given their habitual dithering, seems unlikely.

Given the lack of effective pushback so far against such restrictions, it only stands to reason that things will get more restrictive in future for sexworkers when it comes to accessing financial services. What happens then is a question of conjecture:, as things could go two way. On one side, we can find ourselves moving even more into the cybermoney world as a way to circumvent Big Banking, with every punt being digital. Alternatively, as seen with the weird revival of vinyl albums in a streaming age, we could go full retro, with paying to meet an escort going back to the paper-based roots it so heavily used to have. No matter what eventually happens, life promises to be interesting regardless of what happens to the mechanics of paying to play.

 

 

Finally, we have some decent weeks of summer weather with us. It won't last, it never does, but for now, we may as well enjoy everything that comes with it. To some, the best thing about summer is parking off at the beer garden; to others, it is looking at pretty ladies in sun dresses. To me, the highlight of summer is annoying the neighbours by mowing the lawn while they are settling down for a BBQ. Let's face it, they are going to mess things up anyway, and be forced to order a meal from Deliveroo, so you can say that I am doing them a favour by getting them inside before they are forced to eat a sausage which has been burned to a crisp.

 

Now on the subject of favours, we have been blessed by Hazel, who has gifted us with a whole load of new photos. Some are cosplay themed pics, while others are of a kinkier nature, going from modeling an awesome figurehugging bodysuit down to wearing a vivid cherry latex dress that is as tight as a glove. There are a number of photos on her profile here, but it goes without saying that if you head over to the AdultWork profile of Hazel, there will be more stuff there eventually. If you are lucky, there may also be a couple of video clips which are more than an eye-opener to this lady's erotic abilities. I can guarantee one thing - whether it is from Greggs or the Oktoberfest, you will NEVER look at a sausage in the same way ever again!

 

A question escorts in Manchester are frequently asked is if they enjoy poppers. It is something which brings out a variety of responses, in part since it is very much of a Marmite topic - some people like them, some hate them, and others have no idea what to say because there is so much confusion relating to them, brought about in part by social stigma and media hysteria over them.

 

First, what are poppers? If you're new to this, then we can point out that despite sounding similar to a popular advertising jingle, poppers are not related to Pringles. So, while a can of Pringles can be addictive to the point that once you pop you can't stop, they definitely have no place in the bedroom (unless you're Danielle Lloyd). Rather, poppers is a fairly generic name given for a wide range of chemical products which tend to have a similar chemical composition and provide approximately the same sort of buzz to users. Some types, such as those based on isoamyl nitrites, have strict regulations on their use in the UK, meaning they're essentially banned. Others, however, are based on a twist to the original composition, such as alkyl nitrate, are governed by a different set of guidance relating to their use, distribution and marketing, meaning they are a "legal high" of sorts (despite fairly recent government attempts to ban them outright).

Given they sound similar, it can be confusing discussing them, but it is the latter set of poppers that this post is about. With brand names such as Liquid Gold or Rush XXX, they tend to come in little brown bottles with lurid foils designed to lure in users, rather like vaping liquids and energy drinks are sold to all and sundry now. Unlike adult videos, which are sold in specifically regulated establishments, not only are popper sold online, but they can be bought anywhere on the highstreet, even at the local off-license. However, not only are buyers meant to be 18+, but poppers are not actually sold for adult consumption, but are instead sold for uses as diverse as cleaning leather, nail care, or as a room odoriser (to "odorise" a room, obviously).

Now, unless you are a Tom of Finland afficionado, you're not likely to use a bottle of poppers to polish your finest bondage gear when better products exist. Instead, as happens especially, but not exclusively, in the gay community, you'll be using it as an aid for chemsex. It isn't my place to discuss exactly how this is done, as lack of experience, interest, and a wish to support it means I am not comfortable doing, so I'm going to make my excuses and leave. Suffice to say though, Wikipedia and Google are your friend when it comes to using such items in the best way possible to reach that sensual high.

However, what I will say is this: if you ever do decide to get poppers, unless you're using them while home alone, please pay some consideration to the safety of those around you. Whether you are with pals from the Village or seeing a Manchester escort, poppers are not harmless, so always ask beforehand if you can open a bottle while they are around. Passive smoking harms others, as does passive popping; so what may be a cool headrush to you can end up as a mega headache to someone else, not to mention causing heart issues that can even be fatal. Always close your poppers bottle when finished, and always ensure that your local area is well ventilated, ensuring that the fumes are given a chance to disappear ASAP.

 

Now that you have read this, how about letting this gentlemen offer his opinion on poppers ...

 

@tom.ware

♬ original sound - Tom Ware

 

 

Today is Coronation Day, the official day in which the eldest son of the late Queen gets to change jobs, wear a new hat, and become King. We wish King Charles well, although it is a sad reflection of the times that someone who otherwise qualifies for an old-age pension needs to go out and work. If only the Royals had a couple of bob spare so that he wouldn't be forced to graft away in his golden years, when he'd probably be sipping a glass of vino in Butlins, Benidorm or the Bahamas.

 

Of course, it isn't just Charles who becomes King, as Camilla will now become Queen. Obviously, conspiracy fanatics are not going to be pleased by this particular state of events - while some, inspired by David Icke, believe the Royals are leading players in the lizard alien plan to rule the world; there are others who think it was Diana who truly deserved to be the new queen, had she not been brutally knocked off on the instructions of some mysterious puppetmaser in Buckingham Palace.

 

Personally, as a republican, I don't give a hoot who should be queen. What I do find fascinating though is that this is probably the first instance in which a royal mistress became First Lady of the land. This is major change from events of the 1990s, when Camilla probably ranked alongside Cruella de Vil and O.J. Simpson in the popularity stakes. Along with being reviled for breaking up a fairytale romance, Camilla was a central character in Camillagate, when the media published phonechats where Charles was heard to confess his desire to be her personal tampax. Be that as it may, things have moved on in the intervening years, and we now have King Charles and Queen Camilla.

 

With that in mind, it did lead me to wonder about something: if you ever follow the history of English royals through the ages, while there are instances of them getting their leg over, such behaviour is usually expressed in euphemisms. So, while serial divorcee Henry VIII had numerous wives, other kings, such as Charles II, would either have a royal mistress, or be seen entertaining in the company of a retired actress (or, at a push, seeing "courtesans", who were the FMTY escorts of the powdered wig and horsebuggy era). Generally though, it is rare to read about an English king, or king to be, visiting a brothel or seeking the services of a common prostitute, as if this was a bawdy activity only fit for the lower classes. While some of this may have been down to a belief that you get what you pay for in terms of female company, in other cases, it was down to a need to maintain discretion in how they conducted ones affairs in private, lest it impacted on their public persona.

 

There appears to be only one exception to the rule, and what an exception he was. This notable royal punter of note was Edward VII, son of Queen Victoria and her consort Prince Albert (him of cockring fame), Edward was, like the current king, Prince of Wales for a hell of a lot of time; 59 years until he took the place of Victoria. However, unlike Charles III, Bertie didn't spend his spare time on organic biscuits, playing polo or talking to plants - rather his hobbies were travelling, mens fashion, and banging away at babes in a way which would make even the most seasoned members of UKPunting look like amateurs (except maybe Hendrix).

 

While Victorian Britain was characterised as being a land of rather prudish morals, over in France, life was different. The French were living in a demimonde of artistic expression and sensual exuberance, with Paris being the centre of it all. It was here that Edward, who was as popular as he was portly, became the libertine king, long before he became king of an empire. Unlike modern day clients, who pull their noses up at any escort who doesn't match their perceptions of perfection, Edward was a man of the people, in that he didn't give a hoot about such things. Thus, he was happy to consort with any woman of negotiable virtue regardless of her price, looks or social status, like a true king would.

 

That said, he did like his brothels, with one in particular being his favourite, namely Le Chabanais. While every brothel and massage parlour in Manchester likes to state on its website that it is luxurious, this place actually was the real deal, with gilded staircases, marble floors, fountains and imported silk bedding to match the beauties working there who were fit for a harem. In short, it had the sort of posh amenities you would only ever be likely to find in the old Gallery massage parlour (by comparison, Sandys had the decor of a Toby Carvery compared to that palace in Cadishead). Such was Edward's importance, wealth and regularity at this venue that short of getting a Royal Warrant, he did the next best thing here. Not only did they allow him to have his own personal room, they allowed him to decorate it with his coat of arms, and equipment of his own taste, going so far as to include a custom shagging chair which you can read about here.

Of course, all good things come to an end, so when Bertie eventually was crowned king, it appears his punting habit came to an end too. However, he still confided in certain ladies, with one such mistress being Alice Keppel, a lady whose sense of discretion, finesse and overall culture meant she remained by his side until his death. In a quirk of fate which brings us back to the present day, this royal mistress was to become the great-grandmother of one Camilla Rosemary Shand, who ended up not only in following in her footsteps, but doing one better.  Weird how the world turns out, so Huzzah for King Charles and Queen Camilla!